Couple advocate for adopting locally

By Cherry Sokoloski
North Forty News

Jaden Coleman arrived at his very first home when he was a month old. Born six weeks premature, he had to stay in the hospital for special treatment, not only because he arrived early but also because of prenatal exposure to drugs and alcohol.

His new home was not with his birth parents, but with foster parents Lisabeth Paradise and Jeff Coleman. The Poudre Park residents had been doing emergency foster care for a while, and Larimer County Human Services thought they had a good background for taking care of Jaden's special medical needs. Paradise is a registered nurse, while Coleman is an engineer.

"Timing is everything," said Paradise. She had just quit her job, so she was able to say yes to Jaden.

The couple said yes again a year later, when they officially adopted Jaden as their son. They had planned to provide foster care until Jaden's birthmother could care for him, but her parental rights were terminated when he was 8 months old.

Paradise and Coleman are long-time advocates of adoption from foster care. In fact, Coleman and his two siblings were all adopted through social services in Massachusetts. "We always knew if we had kids, we would adopt," said Paradise. They have no biological children, by choice.

Jaden is now 2 1/2 years old, and the couple continue to advocate for adopting from foster care. While they understand that some families prefer to go overseas to adopt, they would like people to also consider the needs of local children. "These kids are members of our community, and we need to nourish them. If you can change the course of one life, you can better the whole community," Paradise said.

Paradise and Coleman pointed out that adoption through the county was easy for them, and their expenses were minimal. Coleman suggested that people who are nervous about county adoptions could try foster care first.

There have been challenges, of course. Most children adopted from foster care are covered by Medicaid until age 18, and the local couple have found it frustrating to navigate that system. They also worry about the long-term effects of Jaden's prenatal exposure to drugs and alcohol.

But for Paradise and Coleman, the rewards of adopting Jaden have far outweighed the challenges. "Jaden is a super-happy, affectionate kid," said his dad, as his son snuggled in a little closer.

Larimer County Human Services has recently made it easier to adopt from foster care with the Family Journeys Adoption Program. Through this program, the county hosts adoption opportunity receptions every two months, an orientation meeting that informs families about the adoption process. There's an adoption recruiter to work with interested families, as well as classes geared especially to adoptive parents.

"We're trying to make the process as family-friendly as possible," said Bill Stout of Fort Collins, the county's adoption recruiter.

Children who are available for adoption through the county have generally been removed from their birth families because of abuse or neglect, Stout explained, and they have been placed in foster families. While the first goal is to reunite these children with their birth families, this is sometimes not possible. In rare cases when children cannot safely return to birth parents or close relatives, parental rights are terminated by the courts and the county looks for adoptive families. The goal is to give these children a safe, stable environment and a permanent family.

Ages of children available for adoption vary widely, Stout noted. In the past few years, more young children have come into the child welfare system. Of those adopted in the past four years, 43 percent have been age 5 or younger; 43 percent have been 6 to 11; and 14 percent have been in the 12 to 17 age range.

According to Stout, some waiting children are in sibling groups and must be placed together. Some are medically fragile or have prenatal exposure to drugs or alcohol. Many have mental, physical or emotional challenges to overcome. Despite these challenges, Stout said, "all of these children are our neighbors, living right here in our community. Every one of these children needs and deserves a loving, permanent family."

Adoption through the county can work two different ways. Some children are termed "waiting children," meaning their birth parents' rights have been terminated by the court. In other cases, the court has not yet made that decision and the goal is to return the child to the birth family. In these cases the county does what is called "concurrent planning," meaning the child is placed with a foster family who is willing to adopt in the event that the child cannot return to his birth family.

Stout said that some people worry about disputes with the birth family over custody. Once the child becomes legally available for adoption, he pointed out, there is no contact with birth parents unless the adoptive family chooses it.

Under the new program, prospective adoptive parents take a nine-session class over a period of five weeks. The class is free of charge, as is the home study which the county provides. In addition, up to $800 per child may be reimbursed by Larimer County for adoption-related expenses.

"Adoption from foster care costs significantly less than other forms of adoption," Stout noted.

While interested adoptive families do not need to have large incomes, they do need to have sufficient resources to raise a child. Adoption from foster care is open to singles and older adults, and people can either own their own homes or rent. Also, families can have other children and still adopt from foster care.

"Adoption from foster care is not so much about finding a child for a family as it is about finding the most appropriate family for each waiting child," Stout said. Since the county began its Family Journeys program earlier this year, several families have been matched with children. The next Adoption Opportunity reception will be Dec. 1, and a new adoption class will begin in February. For more information, contact Bill Stout at 498-6908 or bstout@larimer.org.